Self-acceptance is Success: How to be successful

Self-acceptance is Success

On the conveyance to work one day, I was having a heart-to-heart with my little one. Yes, a heart-to-heart with the little one swimming and bumbling in my womb. I had the urge to have “The Talk” early—the self-acceptance talk. Over the course of five years, I have realized that the most important requisite for success in business, love or life, in general, is self-acceptance.

I now look at self-acceptance like I view putting together a giant jigsaw puzzle. For those of you who do not know this about me, I love jigsaw puzzles. As a child, one of my greatest commitments and accomplishments was completing a 1000 piece Mataoka (Pocahontas) puzzle. I was so proud of myself—in hindsight, it was pretty tough to piece together. My parents were proud of me too—so much so, my Hena coated it with clear glue and framed it. A couple of years later we sold it at the flea market, but still to this day I sit back and think about that puzzle and how each and every piece was a true ace in its place.

Self-acceptance is Success: How to Be Successful — 1000 Piece Pocahontas Puzzle
Similar to the scene of the 1000 piece puzzle I completed.

Start With Your Edges

We are all puzzle pieces in a bigger picture, and still, each of us is our own complete puzzle. We are all intricately designed to fit perfectly and snuggly in our own well-tailored space on the great board or tapestry of life. Ever tried to fit a puzzle piece into a space not meant for it to be placed? No matter how you turned the piece, and regardless of how it almost fit—you failed to get that piece to conform to that space. Eventually, you must accept that the puzzle piece fits somewhere else.

I recall thinking there was no space for me to just be myself. At the time myself seemed way to complicated of a piece to fit properly into any given space. I knew I desired to do and explore so many things. Write, learn, heal, blog, teach, coach, mentor, podcast, reflect, soul-search, be a poet, design jewelry, talk about love, live life, travel far, make money, and become wealthy doing it all and more—I had a laundry list of I desires and to do’s. Plus, everything I desired to do felt so right to me. Yet, I began to feel that the space in which all of those things fit was either too big of a space for little ole me to fill, too small to cram all of those desires into or simply put, non-existent. Each of the latter thoughts left me sick with stress. What is life if I cannot do all that I really desire to do, be happy doing it, and build a foundation of security upon it?

Quiz Yourself

I had to really pause—stop—take many deep breaths and ask myself a lot of questions. Two questions stood out the most. The first question in many forms was: What do I do best? What am I really good at doing? What can I do almost every day without hesitation? It did not take me a long time to acknowledge that while I love to do a lot of different and wonderful things—I could spend my entire life transcribing my thoughts into words. Writing is my thang.

My second question, like the first, came in a variety of forms. How do I fit into the matrix? Where can I fully express all of myself? How do I establish myself? How can I do all that love and manifest all that desire with my writing? What is my medium of expression?

Believe it, I spent almost a year really contemplating and re-contemplating my questions. Just as much time was expensed finding and accepting the answers to my questions. I had already exhausted so much time trying to create many spaces to fit into. None of this time was wasted of course! Each part of my journey was necessary to get here to the point at which I am writing this piece. We will explore the answers to my second question at a later date.

Self-acceptance

All along I had been seeking a space into which I could force myself in order to dismiss the sense of displacement I had conjure for myself. Once I started to answer my questions I began to see that everything I love to do was merely a stimulate for me transcribing or expressing my thoughts and experiences. Eventually, the sense of displacement transmuted into a bountiful feeling of self-acceptance.

I began to charge myself with an old task renewed. The task: be the woman who paints a portrait from the mattering of her life—dark and/or light. I realized I did not need to try to be a billion different version of myself. Thus, I started to grasp that I only needed to continue to live my life while documenting every moment of falling and rising. I could truly focus on doing all that I desired because those are truly my success factors.


For more on “How to be Successful” or “How to Start a Blog” with your passion that makes money online head over to RESOURCES. Need one-on-one help starting or revamping your blog? I will help! Sign up for an affordable BLOG CONSULTATION. Want to be notified when my new eBook “How to Start a Blog in 2019: Create a Blog with Passion & Make Money Online” is released leave your email here below!

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9 Steps Easy Steps on How to Gain Confidence in Love and Life Confidence

Let Them Think You’re Extra — 9 Steps to Confidence

How to Gain Confidence in Love and Life

  1. Comprehend: onlookers will not understand you. They may find you to be strange, unorthodox. Let them judge you.
  2. Appreciate that YOU are YOU. Your DNA. The foods you eat. Your thoughts—your style. The shows you watch—the way you speak—your laughter too. All of the latter and so much more is part of your own unique life’s experience.
  3. Spend time accepting yourself for everything that you are, are not, and are yet to be.
  4. Invest time into figuring out, exploring all that fuels, excites, and invigorates you. Passion. Purpose. Dreams. Ambitions. Goals. Gifts. Talents. Skills.
  5. Pour into your expression of YOU. It is the uniqueness of your spirit—you in general and as a whole, which makes you most suitable to fulfill your purpose.
  6. Harness, all of you. Leave nothing out. All that is you—lower nature and higher nature—is necessary for a well-refined YOU.
  7. Trust yourself and the divine course of love and life that in good time you will learn how to express yourself better and better.
  8. Know those who misjudge you or despise you have yet to find the keys to themselves.
  9. Accept that those who can feel your shifting and see your light within an abyss of darkness will find you.
*9 is the number of purpose.

For more on nurturing your confidence and finding the keys to yourself check out the categories: SELF & #Teaspiration Thursdays under PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS

 

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Love in Cruise

Love is the First Law

There are three constants in life… change, choice, and principles.

—Stephen Covey

Love is far more than an emotion which causes our hormones to go haywire high of oxytocin. Love is the very foundation of life —existence. Love is a principle upon which all other principles—Peace, Truth, Justice, and Freedom—do stand. Love is a pillar upon which humanity is to rise.  Love is law. To act in opposition to the law of love, the principle of love is to act in opposition of time, nature, life, existence, self, all that is or ever will be.

To any and all who stand in opposition of love or against, we who stand on love ask you what indeed it is that you seek to replace love with? We then assert the latter is rhetorical because there is indeed no thing greater than love—thus, it shall stand and does stand on the record, for the record, that nothing inferior to love is to ever be lifted above the law of love.

Love is the first law. Love will be the last law.

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You are Worth Your Self-Worth - How to build confidence and self worth - Love Yourself

You are Worth Your Self-worth

We  try to force change upon ourselves and others—but change is natural—and nothing natural can be forced. 

I spent a little over a year, maybe even two, fighting myself—or something of the sort. I was in a full-on battle. Literally, I had waged an almost unforgiving, horrendously relentless war against the woman I knew I was becoming—the woman I knew deep-down all of me desired to be. In my spirit rose a resentment toward this woman I had yet to formally meet. Forcibly I was on a mission to postpone her arrival. Some days it felt as if I wanted nothing more than to halt her coming all together. Ironically, I felt that I knew nothing of her. Sadly, as much as I innately desired to see her in all of her highly anticipated grandeur I could not stand feeling her emerging. I loathed watching her from half-shut eyes displacing the me I had grown to find so many comforts within. 

Eventually, I realized there was not much I could do to make myself feel happy and fulfilled until I just allowed myself to simply be—to commit, to leap, to freefall, to find a way to catch myself in mid-air—like a cat—and to land on my feet after all of my shifting, my changing. For my sanity’s sake, I had to make way for her arrival. I had to abandon my complacency.

The Losing Game

Self-worth, esteem, and confidence have been a struggle for me since I was young. Feeling like I did not fit in with my peers left me chasing a reality in which I was either doing too much or most often, not enough. Over time, I began to realize I was not alone in trying to shuffle my many pieces into their appropriate places. Like most wandering spirits—I was never broken or truly ever out of place. My focus was off. Trying to be who I thought I wanted to be, and not who came naturally left me exhausting my good energy. The she who came naturally, I had not planned for. Thus, I resented her. She seemed like too much work—too much to cultivate. She was like a garden left untended—overgrown with weeds.

Truth is, however, trying to be who did not come naturally was even more work—and very self-sabotaging. I found myself constantly drowning in a sea self-conjured anxieties. I found myself competing with a host of uncompetitive forces. The latter left me miserable. I lost my cares for all that I was good at while wallowing in that which could never properly serve me.

Focus on You

The journey back to self-worth is different for everyone, but the common theme is forcing ourselves into spaces too small or too big for us to properly fill. My space is my space. The size, shape, and purpose of your space are the same today as they were the day you were born. Imagine spending your entire life trying to be a superstar when you were always meant to be a highly revered elementary school teacher. You might find yourself depressed, anxious and ultimately unhappy. Do what feels natural. Focus on what comes naturally to you—do that—perfect that. Focus on who comes naturally to you—be that persona—perfect that persona. With the right focus, all else will begin to flow naturally.

 

For more on my own journey back to confidence, self-esteem and self-worth head over to Geiko Skin ♥

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Create a Blog You Can Trust LoveTrips Resources How to Start a Blog - Trustworthy Blogging Information

Create a Blog You Can Trust 

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Today we are living in the age of Aquarius—the age of technology and information. So much of that information is free and readily available with a simple internet search. People everywhere, myself included, are constantly seeking information of all sorts and kinds. Most importantly we are in search of information we can trust. We crave information that feeds our souls, just as much as it enlightens our perspectives. 

If you ever meet my mother-in-law know she is one of the sweetest, most conservative and studious people you will ever meet. However, she has a side few people ever get to witness—her thug-life side. Que Tupac. We will call that her I am very kind and conservative, but I will not take s*** from anyone—know these hands came registered side. Some years ago she inquired about how to start a lifestyle blog to share her experiences and perspective. Well, her inquiry caught me off-guard. I am a pretty consistent blogger and have been for over 5 years. Yet, I never looked at myself as someone who other people would come to seeking blogging advice. Plus, my mother-in-law is a highly informed woman. When she asked me about all of the ins and outs about blogging it took me by surprise—I figured she would have just Googled a how-to already. Right?   

Trustworthy Information

While taking time off to actually work on self and my craft I received even more questions about blogging. Close relatives, friends and even new acquaintances were inquiring how they could start blogs. They actually wanted to sit down with me and hash out all of their questions, hesitations and game plans. I realized my view of myself as a decently seasoned blogger and the view I held about our easy access to how-to’s of all sorts was very distorted.  It had never dawned on me that while Google is a very good source of information, Google can also not be as trustworthy as someone who you actually know, someone who is actually right there in front of you, someone tangible, someone you can reach out and touch.  

So, I realized oftentimes we do not simply need the how-to that we receive from a quick-fix internet search. In reality, search engines regularly serve as replacements for readily-available people to call on when we are in need of trustworthy information. Nevertheless, we still desire to have the how-to that someone we know, respect and actually trust can provide.

The Art of Giving Back

I remember when I started blogging I did not know anyone who blogged. I had no one to introduce me to the best tactics, best practices, or art of blogging. At the time I only had a story I desired to tell—so I danced, fell and loved through the journey. Thus, I am honored to be even writing this series of posts. People still inquired of me how to start a blog. How to go about being consistent? Hoto find the right things to write about? Can people really make money online blogging? I accept now, I do have answers. I have my journey, I know my stumbles and good strides—and so here we are.

My 2019 goal is to share my blogging experience and knowledge of the science behind what makes a successful blog.


For more on “How to Start a Blog” and tips on how to create a blog that makes money online head over to RESOURCES. Need one-on-one help starting or revamping your blog? I will help! Sign up for an affordable BLOG CONSULTATION. Want to be notified when my new eBook “How to Start a Blog in 2019: Create a Blog with Passion & Make Money Online” is released leave your email here below!

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A Space Called Mother

Somewhere between power trip and power failure I exists—in a cold dark place full of warmth—or heat—I dance like water at my best—like ice at my depths. I still birth.

—9:16 post meridiem, November 25th 2018

Here, I imagine—You feel more at home in my body than I do.

I find solace in watching myself trying to be a good mother—a perfect mother—I found honor in knowing that she still only exists adorned in glittering imperfections. I see her tries—all of her attempts that lead to half actions and whole actions have thus far transmuted into You—ten toes, ten fingers—arm, leg, leg, arm, head.

—10:19 ante meridiem, Masha’Allah, November 26th 2018

I have learned to feed you—and still I am not yet half the mother I am to be—for I have only just begun too nourish your cries for my attention—your restless waves for my acknowledgment—your tossing and turning—your tides attempting to pull from my sea shores a distant touch.

—10:53 ante meridiem, Learning to Love Again

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Downtown Baltimore Harbor Fell's Point - How to Start a Blog in 2019 - Create a Blog with Passion and Make Money Online - Niche Blogging tips and SEO tricks for Success

A Blog is Like a Marriage

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A blog is like a marriage—you can have a really bad relationship or a really good relationship with blogging. To be honest, mid-2018 I was not really sure if I was going to be able to return to blogging. Some part of me felt as though I had nothing left to blog about—I had nothing left to give. Yet, there is something about having a someone who pours into you, encourages you, and will tell you when you are flat out being lazy or you just have not executed the plan that you have had in place for the past year, two or however long. Having that someone changes your perspective. For me, that someone is Frank—and so I am back. I am here.

I am here because I truly love the art of blogging. If you truly love the art of blogging as well, but you are on the fence about expressing the art in your life—I am here for you too. If you do not have a Frank in your ear encouraging you to live your passion, please allow me to be your cheerleader, your coach and your #1 blogging confidant and fan.

My relationship with blogging has changed a lot—in one way, I feel as though I have plenty to write about. I also realized Frank was so right. I have had plenty to write about according to 60-plus drafts I have written and simply dismissed the proofing process over the course of 365 days. Yes, I have had 365 days worth of just writing. I have notebooks full of content, all intended to end up in this blog space. Yet, standing on the borderline of depression and drowning in anxiety had me feeling as though nothing was going the way I wanted. Nothing I had to say was worth reading.  

My blog is very much a part of my life. Not blogging felt like a betrayal of that part of my life. So for a blogger whose goal is to be as transparent as possible, feeling like you have nothing left to tell your world, feeling like you are drowning in anxiety is possibly the most important thing to lay down before your world of hearts.  

The good news is there comes a turning point. Somewhere along the cusp of licking your wounds and rising from your self-defeat that you realize all you have been going through is something that the people who have read your works for almost 5 years, or maybe even no years yet, should know. You realize you brought them along for every other journey. They have been there for the happy moments, the irate moments, and the blah blah moments. They even know about the I saw a million geese flying overhead moments. Conveniently, I just saw 7 geese flying overhead. You brought your people along for all of those moments. Yet, when you are rising from your lowest point you feel as though you cannot express to them your transpiring. For some illogical reason they could not, would not or should not meet you there.

That is why I say a blog is like a marriage. A marriage requires communication—very good communication, and very few edits. The truth is, a good marriage is raw. There are no cut cards. Everything is laid out on the table. Every hand is been dealt. When you do decide that you want to edit it is not for the sake of leaving something out. Editing is to say I am not being a b*itch or an assholes. I am not going be petty for petty’s sake. I will not just play tick for tack out of spite. Instead, I am seasoning my words with salt, as my Didd’a often says.  

Maintaining a blog and maintaining a marriage, first and foremost, requires love—a selfless giving of one’s own experiences, thoughts and windows for an all-encompassing good. Then there must come a sense of peace. Peace affirms whatever truth I speak through this blog, you—my readers will be receive with and in love. Somewhere in the blog you will find justice. Justice is giving yourself permission to say this is how exactly I feel, and I am not going to change the way I feel for anyone, but myself.

The most important, yet it is almost the smallest of all, is freedom. Once you would achieve the first love, peace, truth, and justice—freedom comes naturally. Your freedom to express yourself wholly in a marriage makes you free. Freedom makes you feel as though there is nothing that you cannot accomplish. Your freedom makes you feel as though there is no sky that could be a limit. Freedom states that outer space is just another world to be explored.  

I love my blog—it is a place of all those things. Yes, I love my blog, and just like my marriage, like Frank and I, it is always expanding, we are always growing—there is no world to be left untapped. Every year there is something new: trials, tribulations, obstacles, challenges, triumphs, rises, heights, and conquests. It is a beautiful thing—a blog is.

 


For more on “How to Start a Blog” and tips on how to create a blog that makes money online head over to RESOURCES. Need one-on-one help starting or revamping your blog? I will help! Sign up for an affordable BLOG CONSULTATION. Want to be notified when my new eBook “How to Start a Blog in 2019: Create a Blog with Passion & Make Money Online” is released leave your email here below!

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We Manifested - Parenthood, Motherhood blog - LoveTrips Egypt English

We manifested…

I did not fear the spirits—restless souls, entities and hellhounds—that roamed about our childhood home in my youth, or those that followed me into love. Yet, I feared the makings of my own restless spirit, my demons, my tribe’s maternal traumas, and many attachments—spiritual ones, mental ones and physical ones. Those fears lead me to fear my greatest joy, one I had only spent countless moons and seasons wishing, praying and meditating upon—a chance at motherhood, a chance at carrying love in my womb and baring a child to crown—a chance many said I could and would never have. I feared my consort having to settle for a life with only me—as if that was not the first and only life he had set out to live when we first sat by those October train tracks sipping on Jamaican Me Happy. I had to give up my fears, my worries, my self doubts, my addictions—all of my inhibitions. We had to throw away our futile man-made cares, let our freedom hang out, and look back to our stars, our planets, our moons and our many aspects—those that had first charted our way—and fall back into us.

—♥Su Hena

 

Perfect Relationship Be Your Own Best Lover and Friend - The Monday Train Podcast: Learn how to save your relationships with yourself, your marriage and your friendships. The Monday Podcast is on a journey to help you live your best life.

Perfect Relationships EP 2: Be Your Own Best Lover and Friend

Perfect Relationships

The key to your prefect relationships is YOU! Have you stopped to hug yourself today? Did you forget your favorite thing to do alone? Have you spent too much time searching for people outside of yourself to fill shoes that belong to solely you? Join the Tribe for this quick love note on how to attract people who truly love you and only want to see you illuminate by simply being you.

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